I wasn’t going to post this.
I’ve literally written this post over and over again in my head, and even now, I’m not sure if this will actually be published or just spend eternity in my drafts.
The reason is, I’m terrified. And I’m normally not one to be shy about posting my honest opinions on my blog, but recently, social media has become a lego-covered landscape- everywhere I step, I’m afraid it’ll be a wrong and consequential step. I feel like whatever I say and do, whatever I don’t say or don’t do, will be wrong in the eyes of someone somewhere, and lemme tell ya, it’s exhausting having to evaluate and calculate your every step. (@Internet please don’t scream at me >.<)
Another reason I didn’t want to post this is because I fear that what I say will be emotionally-driven, and I’ll forget how to be loving with my words.
But recently, I’ve had quite a few good conversations with others about this topic, and I feel like some things shouldn’t be left unsaid. Especially if these are conversations that need to be happening.
Before I say anything more, I want to preface this by stating that I acknowledge that I will never truly understand and feel what the black community is going through. All the years, decades, centuries of pain that they’ve been put through, I will never understand what that is like and I do not wish to trivialize any of their feelings or experiences.
Like I mentioned before, social media has become a very scary and stress-inducing place for me nowadays. My decreased weekly screen time is evidence of that. It would be a gross understatement to say that the Black Lives Matter movement has become the center of attention on social media. But that’s not why I’m stressed. At first, I was so encouraged to see people from all corners of the world standing up for justice and willing to put themselves out there to defend the black community. But then I felt like the atmosphere shifted. The original intention and goal of posting on social media was to make sure that incidences of racism no longer go by unrecognized and that justice does not merely remain a term we whip out in brief moments of passion. Somewhere along the way, I started feeling that the issue-at-hand evolved to focus more on how a person’s social media activity defined them. And that’s ultimately what stressed me the heck out.
The initial social media activity that ensued shortly after George Floyd’s murder was composed of “Justice for George” posts or “Say His Name” posts. And honestly, I was all about it, because these posts promoted the goal of bringing to our attention the holes in our justice system. But then, they got a lil more aggressive, saying things like, “IF YOU’RE NOT USING YOUR PLATFORM, YOU’RE PART OF THE PROBLEM!!!” “IF YOU’RE POSTING THINGS FROM YOUR DAILY LIFE, YOU’RE PART OF THE PROBLEM!!!” In all caps, with multiple exclamation marks, just like that. And that’s when I got uncomfy with all this negative energy + negative juju flowing all throughout social media. I just felt like there was such a divide happening, like “If you ain’t posting about BLM and only BLM, you ain’t wit us” typa deal. And I think the world’s got enough division right now.
I understand and acknowledge that remaining silent does not accomplish anything, and I definitely agree that in order for issues to be resolved, they need to be exposed first. But it’s also so important to remember that people process things differently and on different timelines. Not everyone processes things at the speed of light (although that would be helpful in some cases), and not everyone has a reactive personality. What if, in the time that others are posting on their social media, the “silent” social media users are actually having really important conversations about racism and justice. Maybe they’re choosing instead to engage in live, face-to-face dialogue that is changing another person’s mindset for the better. Just because they’re not active on social media doesn’t mean they’re completely insensitive or indifferent to the situation. (There are exceptions obvi)
Furthermore, a person’s social media activity/inactivity doesn’t define who they are. I’m sure everyone has been taught this at some point in their life. We learn this in school and hear it from motivational speakers/TED talks. We are always so quick to retweet this in an effort to encourage everyone to get to know people in-person, but this situation has shown me that we don’t truly believe it. And maybe this whole social media situation stems from the way our generation’s been raised. We grew up with social media, and that’s why it plays such a huge role in our lives, and that’s why we’ve been trained to believe the lies that come with it. But here’s your reminder that no, your social media profile is not you, and it shouldn’t dictate who you are. @jojochaochao does not equal Jolene. A “silent” social media user does not necessarily equal indifferent and definitely doesn’t necessarily equal racist.
So. What’s my point in saying all this?? My point is not to blast those who have posted the messages I mentioned above. That is not my intention at all. (If it were, I would be a hypocrite, wouldn't I?). My hope is that we would begin to take steps in understanding each other. And that starts first with learning to extend grace to people. What we need most now is not more anger, but more patience. Don’t assume the worst of people if what they do/think differs from you. Instead of blasting them on social media, instead of posting something that people can so easily scroll past, it would be so much more constructive to DM them and start a conversation. If you notice someone has been “silent",” respectfully ask them about it. Then share your side. You guys don’t have to agree with each other, but at least you’re taking steps to educate each other and giving each other a fair chance to do so. We keep shouting the anthem of EDUCATE YOURSELVES. Ok, well then let’s do that! Everyone is entitled to their own views and has the freedom to defend them. It’s not up to you to make their decisions or form their thoughts for them. What we keep demanding through the BLM movement is not only justice, but equal rights, freedom, + treatment for the black community. Why don’t we start with ourselves and make sure we’re not stealing each other’s rights + freedoms.
Another note to my fellow Christians. We are called to love others. That is made very clear. Are we going to allow our passionate stances on hot + controversial topics override that calling? Have we become so concerned about defending our stance, so concerned about the fact that people are not “speaking up,” so concerned about the fact that people don’t agree with us, that we totally forget how to love people? If we allow that to happen, we are placing worldly things above our great and gracious God. In this time, it is especially important to remember the grace that has been gifted to us.
So please. Let us be kind to each other. Let us be patient towards each other. Let us extend grace to each other. Let us seek to understand each other. In this way, and this way only, can we be unified in fighting for justice and embark on the path to healing.
If you have any issues with what I said, please private message me and we can have a conversation about it. Other than that, thanks for listening! :’)
xoxo, JO